Transcript[]
Men: Aah! [hitting gong] Aah! Mahtim! Mahtim! Mahtim!
Milo: Good afternoon, gentlemen. First off, I’d like to thank this board… for taking the time to hear my proposal. Now, we’ve all heard of the legend of Atlantis… a continent somewhere in the mid-Atlantic… that was home to an advanced civilization… possessing technology far beyond our own… that, according to our friend Plato here… was suddenly struck by some cataclysmic event… that sank it beneath the sea. Now, some of you may ask, why Atlantis? It’s just a myth, isn’t it? Pure fantasy. Well, that is where you’d be wrong. before the Egyptians… built the pyramids… Atlantis had electricity, advanced medicine… even the power of flight. Impossible, you say? Well, no. No, not for them. Numerous ancient cultures all over the globe agree… that Atlantis possessed a power source of some kind… more powerful than steam, than… than coal. More powerful than our modern… internal combustion engines. Gentlemen, I propose that we find Atlantis… find that power source… and bring it back to the surface. Now, this is a page from an illuminated text… that describes a book called the Shepherd’s Journal… said to have been a first-hand account… of Atlantis and its exact whereabouts. Now, based on a centuries-old translation of a Norse text… historians have believed the Journal resides in Ireland. But after comparing the text… to the runes on this Viking shield… I found that one of the letters… had been mistranslated. So, by changing this letter… and inserting the correct one… we find that the Shepherd’s Journal… the key to Atlantis… lies not in Ireland, gentlemen… but in Iceland. Uhh! [Softly] Pause for effect. Gentlemen, uh, I’ll take your questions now. [Telephone rings] Uh, would you gentlemen please excuse me for a moment? [Rings] Cartography and Linguistics, Milo Thatch speaking. [Indistinct angry ranting] Yeah. Uh, just… just a second. Pardon me, Mr. Hickenbottom. [Hissing] How’s that? Is that better? [Indistinct angry ranting] Uh-huh. Yeah. You’re welcome. VOICE: And don’t let it happen again! All right, bye. Now, as you can see by th… by this, um, map… map, uh, that… that… ahem… that I’ve drawn, I plotted the route… that will take myself and a crew… to the southern coast of Iceland to retrieve the Journal. [Cuckoos four times] Ah, showtime. Well, this is it. I am finally getting out of the dungeon. [Thunk] [Thunk] [Whoosh] "Dear Mr. Thatch, this is to inform you… "that your meeting today has been moved up… "from 4:30 P.M. To 3:30 P.M." What? [Whoosh] "Dear Mr. Thatch, due to your absence… "the board has voted to reject your proposal. "Have a nice weekend. Mr. Harcourt’s office." They can’t do this to me! HARCOURT: I swear, that young Thatch… gets crazier every year. If I ever hear the word "Atlantis" again… I’ll step in front of a bus! Ha ha ha! I’ll push you! MILO: Mr. Harcourt! Good Lord! There he is! Members of the board… uh, wait! HARCOURT: How did you find us? MILO: Mr. Harcourt, wait! MAN: Head for the hills! HARCOURT: Where is a guard when you need him? MILO: Mr. Harcourt, you gotta listen to me, sir! Uh, sir? Wait! Mr. Harcourt! Sir, l-I have new evidence that… Please, Mr. Harcourt! Stop! Sir, if you… Could you hold… Thank you very much. Look at… This museum funds scientific expeditions… based on facts, not legends and folklore. Besides, we need you here. - We depend on you. - You do? Yes! What with winter coming… that boiler’s going to need a lot of attention. - Boiler? - Onward, Heinz! But there… there’s a journal! It’s in Iceland! I’m sure of it this time! [Thud] Sir, I really hoped it wouldn’t come to this… but this is… uhh… a letter of resignation. If you reject my proposal, Ill… Whoa! I’ll quit! I mean it, sir. If you refuse to fund my proposal… You’ll what? Flush your career down the toilet… just like your grandfather? You have a lot of potential, Milo. Don’t throw it all away chasing fairy tales. But I can prove Atlantis exists! You want to go on an expedition? Here. Take a trolley to the Potomac and jump in! Maybe the cold water will clear your head. Heinz! [Car drives off] [Antique car horn honks] [Thunder] I’m home. Fluffy? Here, kitty. [Clicking] [Thunder] Milo James Thatch? Who… who are you? How did you get in here? I came down the chimney. Ho, ho, ho. My name is Helga Sinclair. I’m acting on behalf of my employer… who has a most intriguing proposition for you. Are you interested? Your… your… your employer? Heh. Who is your employer? [Thunder] [Thunder] This way, please. And don’t drip on the Caravaggio. Step lively. Mr. Whitmore does not like to be kept waiting. You will address him as "Mr. Whitmore" or "Sir." You will stand unless asked to be seated. Keep your sentences short and to the point. Are we clear? [Gulp] And relax. He doesn’t bite… often. Grandpa? Finest explorer I ever met. Preston Whitmore. Pleasure to meet you, Milo. [Crunch] [Sighs] Join me in a little yoga? Uh, no, no. Thank you. Did you really know my grandfather? Oh, yeah. Met old Thaddeus back in Georgetown. Class of ‘66. We stayed close friends… till the end of his days. [Grunting] Even dragged me along… on some of his danged fool expeditions. Thatch was crazy as a fruit bat, he was. He spoke of you often. Funny. He… he never mentioned you. Oh, he wouldn’t. He knew how much I liked my privacy. [Grunting] I keep a low profile. Mr. Whitmore, should I be wondering why I’m here? Look on that table. WHITMORE: Ah! It’s for you. It’s… it’s from my grandfather. He brought that package to me years ago. He said if anything were to happen to him… I should give it to you… when you were ready… whatever that means. MILO: It… It can’t be. It’s the Shepherd’s Journal. Mr. Whitmore, this journal is the key… to finding the lost continent of Atlantis! Atlantis! Ha ha ha! I wasn’t born yesterday, son. No, no, no. Look… Look at this. Coordinates. Clues. It’s all right here. Yeah, looks like gibberish to me. That’s because it’s been written in a dialect… that no longer exists. - So it’s useless. - No, no, just difficult. I’ve spent my whole life studying dead languages. It’s not gibberish to me. Ah, it’s probably a fake. Mr. Whitmore, my grandfather would have known… if this were a fake. I would know. I will stake everything I own, everything that I believe in… that this is the genuine Shepherd’s Journal. All right, all right. So what do you want to do with it? Well, Ill… Ill… I’ll get funding. I mean, Ill… The museum… WHITMORE: They’ll never believe you. I’ll show them! I will make them believe. Like you did today? Yes! Well, no. How did you… Forget about them, OK? Never mind! I will find Atlantis on my own. I mean, if I have to rent a rowboat! Congratulations, Milo. This is exactly what I wanted to hear. But forget the rowboat, son. We’ll travel in style. It’s all been arranged, the whole ball of wax. Why? For years your granddad bent my ear… with stories about that old book. I didn’t buy it for a minute. So finally I got fed up… and made a bet with the old coot. I said, "Thatch, if you ever actually find… "that so-called journal… "not only will I finance the expedition… "but I’ll kiss you full on the mouth." Imagine my embarrassment… when he found the darn thing. Now I know your grandfather’s gone, Milo… God rest his soul, but Preston Whitmore… is a man who keeps his word. You hear that, Thatch? I’m going to the afterlife… with a clear conscience, by thunder! [Chuckles] [Sighs] Your grandpa was a great man. You probably don’t realize how great. Those buffoons at the museum dragged him down… made a laughingstock of him. He died a broken man. If I could bring back just one shred of proof… that’d be enough for me. Ah, Thatch. What are we standing around for? We got work to do. But, Mr. Whitmore, you know, in order to do… what you’re proposing, you’re gonna need a crew. Taken care of! You’ll need engineers and… and geologists. WHITMORE: Got ‘em all. The best of the best. Gaetan Moliere, geology and excavation. The man has a nose for dirt. Vincenzo Santorini, demolitions. Busted him out of a Turkish prison. Audrey Ramirez. Don’t let her age fool you. She’s forgotten more about engines… than you or I will ever know. They’re the same crew that brought the Journal back. Where was it? WHITMORE: Iceland. I knew it! I knew it! All we need now is an expert in gibberish. So it’s decision time. You can build on the foundation your grandfather left you… or you can go back to your boiler room. - This is for real. - Now you’re catching on. All right. OK. L-l-I’ll have to quit my job. It’s done. You resigned this afternoon. MILO: I did? WHITMORE: Yep. Don’t like to leave loose ends. Um, my apartment. I have to give notice. - Taken care of. - My clothes? - Packed. - My books? - In storage. - My cat? [Meow] My gosh. Your granddad had a saying. "Our lives are remembered… by the gifts we leave our children." This journal is his gift to you, Milo. Atlantis is waiting. What do you say? I’m your man, Mr. Whitmore. You will not regret this. Boy, I am so excited, l-l-l-I can’t even hold it in. [Ship’s horn blows] Carrots. Why is there always carrots? I didn’t even eat carrots. PACKARD: Attention. All hands to the launch bay. To whoever took the "L" from the Motor Pool sign… ha ha, we are all very amused. Excuse me? I need to, uh, report in? Yes, Mr. Thatch? Aah! Uh, it’s you! Blondie, I got a bone to pick with you. Hold that thought. What is it this time, Cookie? You done stuffed my wagon full to bustin’ with non-essentials. Look at all this… cinnamon, oregano, cilantro. What in the cockadoodle is cilantro? And what is this? That would be lettuce. Lettuce? Lettuce?! It’s a vegetable, Cookie. The men need the four basic food groups. I got your four basic food groups! Beans, bacon, whiskey, and lard! [Warning alarm sounds] All right, cowboy. Pack it up and move it out. PACKARD: Attention. All hands to the launch bay. Final loading in progress. [Elevator starts] VINNY: [Italian accent] Hey, Junior. If you’re lookin’ for the pony rides… they’re back there. Excuse me. Excuse me? You dropped your dy-dy-dy-dynamite. Heh heh heh. What else have you, uh, got in there? Oh, eh, gunpowder, nitroglycerin, notepads… fuses, wicks, glue, and… paper clips. Big ones. You know, just, uh, office supplies. Milo! Where you been? I want you to meet Commander Rourke. He led the Iceland team that brought the Journal back. Milo Thatch. Pleasure to meet the grandson of old Thaddeus. I see you got that journal. Nice pictures, but… I prefer a good western myself. Pretty impressive, eh? Boy, when you settle a bet, y-you settle a bet. Well, your granddad always believed… you couldn’t put a price on the pursuit of knowledge. Well, uh, believe me this’ll be small change… compared to the value of what we’re gonna… learn on this trip. Yes, this should be enriching for all of us. PACKARD: Attention, all personnel. Launch will commence in 15 minutes. - Mr. Whitmore. - Rourke. ROURKE: It’s time. - Bye, Mr. Whitmore! - Make us proud, boy! DIVING OFFICER: Rig ship for dive! CHIEF OF THE WATCH: Aye, sir! Rig ship for dive. Lieutenant, take her down. Diving officer, submerge the ship. Make the depth 1-5-0 feet. DIVING OFFICER: Make the depth 1-5-0 feet. INTERCOM: Dive, dive! Five degrees down bubble. DIVING OFFICER: Take us down. [Warning alarm buzzes] PACKARD: Attention. Tonight’s supper will be baked beans. Musical program to follow. [Sighs] PACKARD: Who wrote this? Aah! You have disturbed the dirt. - Uh, pardon me? - You have disturbed the dirt! Dirt from around the globe, spanning the centuries! [Gasps] What have you done? England must never merge with France! - What’s it doin’ in my bed? - You ask too many questions. Who are you? Who sent you? Speak up! - Me? I’m, uh… - Bah! I will know soon enough. Hey, hey, hey! Let go! Do not be such a crybaby. Hold still. Aha! There you are. Now tell me your story, my little friend. Parchment fiber from the Nile circa 500 B. C. Lead pencil, number 2. Paint flecks… of a type used in government buildings. You have a cat, short-haired Persian… two years old, third in a litter of seven. There are all the microscopic fingerprints… of the mapmaker. And linguist. - Hey, how did you… - This is an outrage! You must leave at once! Out, out, out, out, out! Uh-oh. Sat in the dirt, didn’t you? Moliere, now what have I told you… about playing nice with the other kids? Get back. I’ve got soap, and I’m not afraid to use it. [Hisses] Back, foul creature! Back to the pit from which you came! [Grunts] The name’s Sweet. Joshua Sweet. Medical officer. MILO: Yeah, Milo Thatch. Milo Thatch. You’re my 3:00. Well, no time like the present. - Oh, boy. - Nice, isn’t it? The catalog says that this little beauty… can saw through a femur in 28 seconds. I’m bettin’ I can cut that time in half. Now, stick out your tongue and say "ahh." Oh, no, really, I have a… Aah. - So, where you from? - [Grunting] Really? I have family up that way. Beautiful country up there. Do you do any fishing? [Garbled speech] Me? I hate fishing. I hate fish. Hate the taste, hate the smell… and hate all them little bones. Here, I’m gonna need you to fill these up. [Sputters] With what? PACKARD: Will Milo Thatch please report to the bridge? Thank you. I mean, uh, uh, nice meeting you. Uh-huh. Nice meeting you, too. So I says to him, "What’s wrong with my meatloaf?" And he says to me… Oh. Hold on a second, Margie, I got another call. Sir, we’re approaching coordinates. Hello, Margie? Yeah, so anyways, he says… ROURKE: All right, let’s have a look around. HELGA: Aye, sir. Set course to 2-4-0. on the bow planes. Come right 2-4-0. Welcome to the bridge, Mr. Thatch. OK, everybody… I want you to give Mr. Thatch… your undivided attention. Good afternoon. Can everyone hear me OK? Heh, OK, uh, how… how ‘bout some slides? The… the first slide is a depiction of a creature. A creature so frightening… that sailors were said to be driven mad… by the mere sight of it. PACKARD: Hubba, hubba. Uh, I’m sorry. That’s… wrong. [Spanish accent] Geez, I used to take lunch money… from guys like this. Anyway, this, uh… OK. This is an illustration of the Leviathan… the creature guarding the entrance to Atlantis. With something like that… I would have white wine, I think. It’s a mythical sea serpent. He’s described in the Book of Job. The… the Bible says… "Out of his mouth go burning lights… sparks of fire shoot out." But more likely it’s a carving or a sculpture… to frighten the superstitious. So we find this masterpiece. Then what? When do we dig? Actually, we don’t have to dig. You see, according to the Journal… the path to Atlantis will take us down a tunnel… at the bottom of the ocean, and we’ll come up a curve… into an air pocket right here… where we’ll find the remnants… of an ancient highway that will lead us to Atlantis. Kind of like the grease trap in your sink. Cartographer, linguist, plumber. Hard to believe he’s still single. - You said there’d be digging. - Go away, Mole. Captain, you’d better come look at this, sir. OK, class dismissed. Give me exterior lights. Look at that. There are ships here from every era. [Beeping] [Hiss] [Radio static] Commander, I think you should hear this. "Predeshtem logtu nug… nah geb." PACKARD: Commander? Commander? "Enter the lair of the Leviathan." PACKARD: Commander? "There you will find the path to the gateway." PACKARD: Commander? Yes, Mrs. Packard. What is it? I’m picking up something on the hydrophone… - I think you should hear. - Put it on speakers. [Groaning and whooshing sounds] What is it? A pod of whales? Uh-uh. Bigger. It sounds metallic. Could be an echo off one of the rocks. Do you want to do my job? Be my guest. Is it just me, or is that getting louder? Well, whatever it was, it’s gone now. Helmsman! Bring us about. Tighten our search pattern and slow us to… [Crash] [Alarm bell ringing] Out of the way! [Crew shouting] [Roar] Tell Cookie to melt the butter… and break out the bibs. I want this lobster served up on a silver platter. Load the torpedo bays! Subpod crews, battle stations! [Gasps] ENSIGN: Battle stations! ROURKE, ON INTERCOM: Steady, boys. Don’t panic. Jiminy Christmas! It’s a machine! [Alarm bell ringing] Wait, wait! Uhh! Launch subpods! ENSIGN: Subpods away! ROURKE, ON RADIO: Fire! We’re free. All ahead full. Fire torpedoes! ENSIGN: Fire torpedoes! Get me the bridge! Sir, it’s engineering on four. AUDREY, ON INTERCOM: Rourke! We took a big hit down here… and we’re taking on water fast. I don’t want to be around when it hits the boilers. How much time do we have? if the bulkhead holds. [Clang] You better make that five. You heard the lady. Let’s move! Move! Where? Move where? Packard, sound the alarm! He took his suitcase? Marge, honey, I don’t think he’s comin’ back. - Packard! - I have to call you back. No, no, I’ll call you. [Alarm sounds] PACKARD: All hands, abandon ship. Move it, people! Sometime today would be nice! Come on! Everybody grab a seat and buckle in. Lieutenant, get us out of here! ROURKE: Lieutenant! HELGA: I’m working on it! [Roars] Hang on. Where to, Mr. Thatch? We’re looking for a big crevice of some kind. There! Up ahead. All craft, make your mark Roger! 20 degrees down angle. Right behind you! MOLE: Sacre bleu! MAN: We’re getting killed out here! Look out! It’s only a grease trap. It’s just like a sink. It’s only a grease trap. It’s just like a sink! Seven hours ago, we started this expedition… with 200 of the finest men and women I’ve ever known. We’re all that’s left. I won’t sugar-coat it, gentlemen. We have a crisis on our hands. But we’ve been up this particular creek before… and we’ve always come through, paddle or no paddle. I see no reason to change that policy now. From here on in, everyone pulls double duty. Everyone drives, everyone works. Looks like all our chances for survival… rest with you, Mr. Thatch. You and that little book. We’re all gonna die. ROURKE: OK, people. Saddle up. Lieutenant, I want this convoy moving five minutes ago. Moliere, you’re on point. No, Vinney, Audrey’s taking the oiler. You know the rules. I want you 50 yards… behind that truck at all times. And, Packard, put out that cigarette. [Beep] [Beep beep] [Beep beep beep] [Beep beep beep] [Squeak] Are you sure you’re checked out on this class of vehicle? - Uhh… - Can you drive a truck? Pfft! Heh heh. Of course I can drive a truck. I mean, sure, you got your steering… and your gas and your brake… and, of course, this metal, uh, looking… thing. OK, so it was a bumper car at Coney Island… but it’s the same basic principle! [Sighs] [Brakes squeal] [Horn beeps] DRIVER: Come on! MILO: Sorry abou… sorry about that. SECOND DRIVER: Come on, civilian! Oof. Ahh. You didn’t just drink that, did you? - Mm-hmm. - That’s not good. That’s nitroglycerin. - [Gags] - Don’t move. Eh, don’t breathe. Don’t do anything, except pray maybe. - Boom! - Aah! [Laughing] SWEET: [Chuckles] Yeah. MILO: Good night! Will you look at the size of this! It’s gotta be half a mile high at least. It… it must have taken hundred… no, pfft, thousands of years to carve this thing. [Explosion] Hey, look, I made a bridge. It only took me, like, what? [Chattering] Looks like we have a little roadblock. Vinny, what do you think? I could unroadblock that if I had about 200 of these. Problem is I only got about… 10. Plus, you know, five of my own… and a couple of cherry bombs… a road flare. Hey, too bad we don’t have some nitroglycerin, eh, Milo? [Laughing hysterically] Looks like we’re gonna have to dig. [Gasps gleefully] It will be my pleasure. Aah! [Backfires] [Coughing] [Beeps horn] Oh! Stupid! You are stupid! I don’t understand it. I just tuned this thing up this morning. Um… It looks like the rotor’s shot! I’m gonna have to pull a spare… from one of the trucks. - Can l… - No toques nada! I’ll be right back. [Hissing and groaning] [Whoosh] She lives! Hey, what’d you do? Well, you know, the boiler in this baby… is a Humac model P54/813. Now we got the 814 back at the museum. The heating cores on the whole Humac line… have always been a little, you know, temperamental… so sometimes you gotta… boom! Persuade ‘em a little. Yeah, yeah, thank you very much. Shut up. Two for flinching. Ooh! [Mole laughing] This is it. It’s gotta be. ROURKE: All right, we’ll make camp here. Why is it glowing? Pah! It is a natural phosphorescence. That thing is going to keep me up all night, I know it. [Triangle jangling] COOKIE: Come and get it! For the appetizer, Caesar salad… escargot… and your Oriental spring rolls. - Yuck. - I wanted the escargot. Knock yourself out. There you go, Milo. Put some meat on them bones. Thanks, Cookie. That looks greasier than usual. You like it? Well, have some more. You’re so skinny, if you turned sideways… and stuck out your tongue you’d look like a zipper. You know, we’ve been pretty tough on the kid. What do you say we cut him some slack? Yeah, you’re right. Hey, Milo! Why don’t you come sit with us? Really? You don’t mind? Nah. Park it here. Gee, this is great. I mean, you know… it’s an honor to be included in your… [Pbbbt] [Laughing] - Mole! - Ah, forgive me. I could not resist. Hey, Milo, don’t you ever close that book? Yeah, you must’ve read it a dozen times by now. I know, but this… this doesn’t make any sense. See, in this passage here, the shepherd… seems to be leading up to something. He calls it the heart of Atlantis. It could be the power source the legends refer to. But then it just… it cuts off. It’s almost like there’s a missing page. Kid, relax. We don’t get paid overtime. I know, I know. Sometimes I get a little carried away. But, hey, you know, that’s what this is all about, right? I mean, discovery, teamwork, adventure. Unless, maybe… you’re just in it for the money. - Money. - Money. - Money. - Money. I’m gonna say… money. [Sighs] Well, I guess I set myself up for that one. [Grunts] What, is something wrong with your neck? Oh, yeah, I must’ve hurt it when… [Cracking] Aah! Ow! Better? [Grunts] Yeah! Hey, how’d you learn how to do that? - An Arapaho medicine man. - Get outta here. Born and raised with ‘em. My father was an army medic. He settled down in the Kansas Territory… after he met my mother. No kidding. Nope. I got a sheepskin from Howard U. And a bearskin from old Iron Cloud. Halfway through medical school, I was drafted. One day I’m studying gross anatomy in the classroom… the next I’m sewing up Rough Riders on San Juan Hill. Main course. I couldn’t eat another bite. AUDREY: I’m watching my weight. Ha ha ha, don’t you worry. It’ll keep and keep and keep. Thank God I lost my sense of taste years ago. Aren’t you going to pitch up your tent? Uh, I did. I guess I’m still a little rusty at this. I haven’t gone camping since… well, the last time my grandpa took me. I never got to meet your grandfather. What was he like? Where do you start? He was like a father to me, really. My parents died when I was a little kid… and he took me in. - [Chuckles] - What? Well, I was just thinkin’. One time, when I was eight, we were hiking along this stream… and I saw something shining in the water. It was a genuine arrowhead. Well, you’d think I’d found a lost civilization… the way Grandpa carried on about it. It wasn’t until I was older… that I realized that the arrowhead… was just some compressed shale… mixed with zinc pyrite that had fractured… into an isosceletic triangulate. [Giggles] That is so cute! Say, Audrey, uh, no… no offense… but how does a teenager become the chief mechanic… of a multimillion dollar expedition?
Audrey: Well, I took this job when my dad retired. But the funny thing was… he always wanted sons, right? One to run his machine shop and the other… to be middleweight boxing champion. But he got my sister and me instead.
Milo: So, what… what happened to your sister? She’s 24 and 0, with a shot at the title next month. Anyway, I’m saving up… so my Papi and I can open another shop. Forget your jammies, Mrs. Packard? I sleep in the nude. SWEET: You’re gonna want a pair of these. She sleepwalks. Well, as far as me goes… I just like to blow things up. SWEET: Come on, Vinny… tell the kid the truth. My family owned a flower shop. We would sell roses… carnations, baby’s breath, you name it. One day, I’m making… about three dozen corsages for this prom. You know, the one they put on their wrist. And everybody, they come. "Where is it?" "When is it?" "Does it match my dress?" It’s a nightmare. Anyway, I guess there was this leak next door… of gas or what. Boom! No more Chinese laundry. Blew me right through the front window. It was like a sign from God. I found myself that boom. [Grunting] [Mole chuckles] What’s Mole’s story? Trust me on this one. You don’t wanna know. Audrey, don’t tell him. You shouldn’t have… told me, but you did. And now I’m telling you… you don’t wanna know. [Cookie snoring] [Milo yawns] The redhead’s got a gun. [Snores] Ahh, ooh. Ah! Aah! Holy… Whoa! Fire. Fire! Fire! Fire! MILO: Fire! I’m gonna kill him. Thatch, go back to bed. Get some water on that fire! ROURKE: No time! Get us into those caves! Move it! Move it! Move it! COOKIE: Ya-ha! Gertie, pull! Milo, jump! Right now! Aah! Aah! [Tires squealing] No, no, no, no, no, no, no! Whoa! Whoa! Aah! Aah! [Crash] All right, who’s not dead? Sound off. [Groaning and muttering] COOKIE: Danged lightnin’ bugs… done bit me on my sit-upon. Somebody’s gonna have to suck out that poison. Now don’t everybody jump up at once. [Sighing] ROURKE: Audrey, give me a damage report. Not as bad as it could have been. We totaled rigs two and seven… but the digger looks like it’ll still run. Lucky for us we landed in something soft. Pumice ash. We are standing… at the base of a dormant volcano. HELGA: It just keeps going. Maybe that’s our ticket outta here. Maybe not. The magma has solidified in the bowels of the volcano… effectively blocking the exit. I got the same problem with sauerkraut. Hold on. Back up. Are you sayin’ this whole volcano… can blow at any time? No, no, no, no. That would take an explosive force… of great magnitude. [Sproing] Maybe I should do this later, huh? If we could blow the top off of that thing, we’d have a straight shot to the surface. Mr. Thatch, what do you think? Mr. Thatch? ROURKE: Thatch? [Breathing heavily] [Voices speaking Atlantean] [Grunts] [Sighs] [Rumbling] Hey, wait! MILO: Who… who are you? Where are you going? Come back! [Grunting] [Echoing] Hey, wait a minute! Who are you? Sweet mother of Jefferson Davis! It’s beautiful. Milo, I gotta hand it to you. You really came through. [Screeching] SWEET: Uh, I take that back. Holy cats! Who are these guys? - They gotta be Atlanteans. - What? That’s impossible! I seen this back in the Dakota. They can smell fear just by looking at ya. So keep quiet. [Speaking Atlantean] I think it’s talking to you. [Speaking Atlantean] [Haltingly speaking Atlantean] Ita, sum amice viator. Dices linguam Romae. Parlez-vous francais? Oui, monsieur! They speak my language! Pardon, mademoiselle? Ah, voulez-vous… [Whispering] Ooh, I like her. Hmm! ‘Bout time someone hit him. I’m just sorry it wasn’t me. Buenos dias. Guten tag! [Atlanteans speaking various languages] How do they know all these languages? Their language must be based on a root dialect. It’s just like the Tower of Babel. Well, maybe English is in there somewhere. We are explorers from the surface world. We come in peace. Welcome to the city of Atlantis. Come. You must speak with my father now. Squad "B," head back to the shaft… and salvage what you can. OFFICER: Yes, sir! ROURKE: We’ll rendezvous in 24 hours. OFFICER: Let’s move it. You heard him. [Sighs] I’m so excited! [Screeching] MILO: Now, what’s really amazing is that… if you deconstructed Latin, you overlaid it… with a little Sumerian… throw in a dash of Thessalonian… you’d be getting close to their basic grammatical structure. Or at least you’d be in the same ballpark… - Someone’s having a good time. - Like a kid at Christmas. Commander, there were not supposed to be people down here. This changes everything. This changes nothing. MILO: Take that, Mr. Harcourt! ROURKE: Your Majesty? On behalf of my crew… may I say it is an honor to be welcomed to your city. Ahem. Uh, excuse me? Commander? You presume much… to think you are welcome here. Oh, sir, we have come a long way looking for… I know what you seek… and you will not find it here. Your journey has been in vain. But we are peaceful explorers, men of science. Heh heh heh. And yet you bring weapons. Our weapons allow us to remove obstacles we may encounter. Some obstacles cannot be removed with a mere show of force. Return to your people. You must leave Atlantis at once. Oh, Your Majesty, be reasonable. Sir… Not now, son. Trust me on this. We better do as he says. May I respectfully request that we stay one night, sir? That would give us time to rest, resupply… and be ready to travel by morning. Hmm. Very well. One night. That is all. Well, thank you, Your Majesty. [Sighs] Mmm. Your heart has softened, Kida. A thousand years ago… you would have slain them on sight. A thousand years ago, the streets were lit… and our people did not have to scavenge for food… at the edge of a crumbling city! The people are content. They do not know any better! We were once a great people. Now we live in ruins. The kings of our past would weep… if they could see how far we have fallen. - Kida. - Lf these outsiders… can unlock the secrets of our past… perhaps we can save our future. What they have to teach us… we have already learned. Our way of life is dying. Our way of life is preserved. Mmm. Kida, when you take the throne… you will understand. So, how’d it go? Well, the King and his daughter don’t exactly see eye to eye. She seems to like us OK, but the King… I don’t know, I think he’s hiding somethin’. Well, if he’s hiding something, I want to know what it is. Someone needs to talk to that girl. I will go! Someone with good people skills. I will do it! Someone who won’t scare her away. I volunteer! Someone who can speak the language. For the good of the mission, I will go! Good man, Thatch. Thanks for volunteering. [Sobbing] Go get ‘em, tiger. OK, Milo, don’t take no for an answer. "Look, I have some questions for you… and I’m not leaving this city until they’re answered!" Yeah, that’s it. That’s good, that’s good. I have some questions for you… and you are not leaving this city… until they are answered. Yeah, well, l… OK. Shh! Come with me. Oh, there is so much to ask about your world. You are a scholar, are you not? Judging from your diminished physique… and large forehead… you are suited for nothing else. What is your country of origin? When did the flood waters recede? - How did you… - Wait a minute. I got a few questions for you, too. So let’s do this, OK? You ask one, then I’ll ask one… then you, then me, then… Well, you get it. Very well. What is your first question? Well, OK, uh, how did you get here? Well, I mean, not you personally… but your… your culture. I mean, how did all of this end up down here? It is said that the gods became jealous of Atlantis. They sent a great cataclysm and banished us here. All I can remember is the sky going dark… and people shouting and running. Then, a bright light, like a star… floating above the city. My father said it called my mother to it. I never saw her again. I’m sorry. If it… if it’s any consolation… l-I know how you feel, because I lost my… Wait a minute. Wait a minute! Whoa, back up! Wh… what… what are you telling me… that you remember because you were there? No, that… that’s impossible… because, I mean, that would make you… you know, Yes. Oh, well, hey, uh, pfft! Lookin’ good. Just, uh, ahem… You got another question for me? Yes. How is it you found your way to this place? Well, I’ll tell you, it wasn’t easy. If it weren’t for this book, we never would have made it. OK, second question. Legend has it that your people possessed… a power source of some kind that enabled them… You mean you can understand this? Yes, I’m a linguist. That’s what I do, that’s my job. Now, getting back to my question… This, right here, you can read this? Yes, yes, I can read Atlantean, just like you. You can’t, can you? No one can. Such knowledge has been lost to us… since the time of the Mehbelmok. Oh, the Great Flood. Show me. OK, uh… [Reading in Atlantean] "Follow the narrow passage for another league. There you will find the fifth marker." Yeah. Yeah, that’s it. How was my accent? Boorish, provincial… and you speak it through your nose. Yeah, gotta work on that. Here, let me show you something. What? It looks like some sort of vehicle. Yes. But no matter what I try… it will not respond. - Perhaps if… - Way ahead of you. OK, let’s see what we got here. OK. "Place crystal into slot." Yes, yes, I have done that! "Gently place your hand on the inscription pad." - Yes! - OK, did you… turn the crystal one-quarter turn back? Yes. Yes! While your hand was on the inscription pad? Ye… No. Ah, well, see, there’s your problem right there. That’s an easy thing to miss. You know, you deserve credit… for even… even gettin’ this far. OK, uh, give it a try. [Gasps] [Speaking Atlantean] Yeah, you got that right. Oh, th… this is great! With this thing… I could see the whole city in no time at all. Wonder how fast it goes. [Crashing] [Crash] [Sputters] So, who’s hungry? By the way, we were never properly introduced. My name’s Milo. My name is Kidagakash. Ki-Ki-Kidamaschnaga. Uh, hey, you got a nickname? [Giggles] Kida. OK, Kida. I can remember that. Wow. [Sighs] What is wrong? Oh, it’s nothing. I just… got something in my eye. You know, my grandpa used to tell me stories… about this place as far back as I can remember. I just wish he could be standing here with me. [Speaking Atlantean] Ah! Ah! Ee-yah! [Crunch] Tell me more about your companions. Your physician, he is called Cookie? No, that’s Sweet. What is? The doctor. He’s Sweet. Oh, he is kindly. No, no, no, that… that’s his name. His name is Kindly? No, Sweet. Well, I mean, he’s kindly, too. So all of your doctors are sweet and kindly? No. Well, l-I’m sure some are. Ours is, but that’s not a requirement. You’re missing the point. You are confusing me. Wow. Look at all those tattoos. Shoot. That ain’t nothin’. Look here what I got. All 38 United States. Watch me make Rhode Island dance. Go on, baby, dance. Dance. [SIoshing] There you go. [Giggling] [Speaking Atlantean] Cookies are sweet, but yours is not. Sweet is kindly, but that is not his name. Audrey is sweet, but she is not your doctor. And the little digging animal called Mole… he is your pet? Close enough. [Slurping] Oh, don’t forget to eat the head. That’s where all the nutrients are. [Swallows and burps] [Footsteps] [Breathing through gas mask] MILO: You know, Kida… the most we ever hoped to find… was some crumbling buildings, maybe some broken pottery. Instead, we find a living, thriving society. Heh heh. These guys are kinda cute when they’re not, you know… formed into a fiery column of death. We are not thriving. True, our people live… but our culture is dying. We are like a stone the ocean beats against. With each passing year… a little more of us is worn away. I wish there was something I could do. I have brought you to this place to ask you for your help. There is a mural here… with writing all around the pictures. Yeah, well, you came to the right guy. OK, let me see. Let’s start with this column right here. Uh, well, this, uh, uh, Kida? Uh, heh, what are you doin’? You do swim, do you not? Oh, I swim pretty girl. Pr-pretty good! Pretty good. Sw… Good, swim good. Pretty good. I swim pretty good. Good. It is a fair distance to where we are going. Hey, you are talkin’ to the belly flop champ… at Camp Runamuck. Oof! [Giggles] Come on, we’re… we’re wasting time. [Gasps] Why don’t you lead the way… because I have no idea where we’re going. [Gasping] - Are you all right? - Well, I didn’t drown, so… Good. Follow me. [Gasps] This is amazing! A complete history of Atlantis! It’s just like Plato described it. Well, he was off on a few details, but… The light I saw. The star in the middle of the city. What does the writing say about that? I don’t know yet. But we’re gonna find out. Come on. [Gasping] - The heart of Atlantis! - What? It’s the heart of Atlantis! That’s what the shepherd w-was talking about. It wasn’t a star, it was… it was some kind of crystal… uh, like these! Don’t you get it? The power source I’ve been looking for… the bright light you remember… - they’re the same thing! - That cannot be. It’s what’s keeping all these things… you, all of Atlantis alive. Then where is it now? I don’t know, I don’t know. You’d think something this important… would have been in the Journal, but… Unless… The missing page. [Gasps] You have a nice swim? Hey, guys, what’s going on? What’s… what’s with all the guns? MILO: Guys? [Exhales] I am such an idiot. This is just another treasure hunt for you. You’re after the crystal. Oh, you mean this? The heart of Atlantis. ROURKE: Yeah. About that… I would’ve told you sooner… but it was strictly on a need-to-know basis… and, well, now you know. I had to be sure you were one of us. Welcome to the club, son. I’m no mercenary. [Gasps] Whoa! [Gunshot] Uhh! Mercenary? I prefer the term "adventure capitalist." Besides, you’re the one who got us here. You led us right to the treasure chest. You don’t know what you’re tampering with, Rourke. What’s to know? It’s big. It’s shiny. It’s going to make us all rich. You think it’s some kind of a diamond… I thought it was some kind of a battery… but we’re both wrong. It’s their life force. That crystal is the only thing keeping these people alive. You take that away, and they’ll die. Well, that changes things. Helga, what do you think? Knowing that, I’d double the price. I was thinking triple. Rourke, don’t do this. Academics. You never want to get your hands dirty. Think about it. If you gave back every stolen artifact… from a museum… you’d be left with an empty building. We’re just providing a necessary service… to the archeological community. Not interested. I got to admit, I’m disappointed. You’re an idealist, just like your grandfather. Do yourself a favor, Milo. Don’t be like him. For once, do the smart thing. I really hate it when negotiations go sour. [Snaps fingers] [Cocks gun] Let’s try this again. - Knock, knock. - Room service. Tell them to drop their weapons… now! [Speaking Atlantean] Spread out! Search everywhere! You’re not applying yourself, son. There’s got to be something else. Well, there isn’t. It just says… "The heart of Atlantis lies in the eyes of her king." ROURKE: Well, then maybe Old King Cole here… can help us fill in the blanks. How about it, chief? Where’s the crystal chamber? You will destroy yourselves. Maybe I’m not being clear. Ohh! [Speaking Atlantean] Rourke, this was not a part of the plan. Plan’s changed, doc. I’d suggest you put a bandage… on that bleeding heart of yours. It doesn’t suit a mercenary. Well, as usual, diplomacy has failed us. Now I’m going to count to 10… and you’re going to tell me where the crystal is. [Cocks gun] t… ROURKE: The heart of Atlantis… lies in the eyes of her king. This is it. We’re in. Rourke, for the last time… you’ve got to listen to me. You don’t have the slightest idea… what this power is capable of. True, but I can think of a few countries… who’d pay anything to find out. [Rumbling] Hurry. Get on. Jackpot. Ohh. The kings of our past. [Speaking Atlantean softly] Thatch, tell her to wrap it up. We got a schedule to meet. Um… Kida… I’m sorry. [Voices murmuring] Come on, let’s get this over with. I don’t like this place. All right, Thatch, what’s next? OK, there’s a giant crystal… hovering 150 feet above our heads… over a bottomless pit of water. Doesn’t anything surprise you? ROURKE: The only thing that surprises me… Mahtim. ROURKE: That thing’s not on the truck yet. Now move it! I don’t know how to move it. I don’t even know what’s holding it up there. Ahh. Talk to me, Thatch. What’s happening? Look, all it says here… is that the crystal is alive somehow. It… I don’t know how to explain it. It’s their deity. It’s their power source. ROURKE: Speak English, professor. MILO: They’re part of it. It’s a part of them. L… I’m doing the best I can here. Well, do better. Oh, I know. Why don’t you translate… and I’ll wave the gun around. What did she say? I don’t know. L… I didn’t catch it. [Woman sings in Atlantean] [Chorus singing] [Rumbling] [Thunder] [Thunder] [Rumbling] [Low humming] [Energy blasts] [Noises stop] [Energy blasts] Hold your horses, lover boy. Kida. Kida. [Rumbling] [Rumbling stops] MILO: No, don’t. Don’t touch her. [People murmuring] SERGEANT: All right, step back. SQUAD LEADER: Sergeant, keep those people back. You heard him. Step back. SERGEANT: I’m warning you. So… I guess this is how it ends, huh? Fine. You win. You’re wiping out an entire civilization… but, hey… you’ll be rich. MILO: Congratulations, Audrey. Guess you and your dad will be able… to open up that second garage after all. And, Vinny, you can start a whole chain of flower shops. I’m sure your family’s going to be very proud. But that’s what it’s all about, right? Money. Get off your soapbox, Thatch. You’ve read Darwin. It’s called natural selection. We’re just helping it along. Commander, we’re ready. Yeah, give me a minute. I know I’m forgetting something. I got the cargo, the crystal, the crew… Oh, yeah. [Atlanteans gasp] Look at it this way, son. You were the man who discovered Atlantis… and now you’re part of the exhibit. Let’s move, people. HELGA: That was an order, not a suggestion. Let’s go! [Sighs] [Inhales] We’re all going to die. ROURKE: Oh, you can’t be serious. This is wrong, and you know it. We’re this close to our biggest payday ever… and you pick now of all times to grow a conscience. We’ve done a lot of things we’re not proud of… robbing graves, plundering tombs… double parking… but nobody got hurt. Well, maybe somebody got hurt… but nobody we knew. ROURKE: Well, if that’s the way you want it, fine. More for me. P.T. Barnum was right. [Engine backfires] We can’t let him do this! Wait a second. [Crowd gasps] OK, now you can go. SWEET: Milo, you better get up here. MILO: How’s he doing? Not good, I’m afraid. Internal bleeding. There’s nothing more I can do. MILO: What a nightmare. And I brought it here. Ah, don’t go beating yourself up. He’s been after that crystal since Iceland. The crystal. Sweet, that’s it. These… these crystals… they have some sort of healing energy. I’ve… I’ve seen it work. KING: No. Where is my daughter? Well, she… she… Mmm. She has been chosen… like her mother before her. What? KING: In times of danger… the crystal will choose a host… one of royal blood… to protect itself… and its people. It will accept no other. W-Wait a minute. Choose? So this thing is alive? In a way. The crystal thrives… on the collective emotions… of all who came before us. In return, it provides power… longevity, protection. As it grew… it developed a consciousness of its own. [Coughs] In my arrogance… I sought to use it as a weapon of war… but it’s power proved too great to control. It overwhelmed us… and led to our destruction. That’s why you hid it beneath the city… to keep history from repeating itself. KING: And to prevent Kida from suffering the same fate… as my beloved wife. What do you mean? Wh… What’s going to happen to Kida? If she remains bonded to the crystal… she could be lost to it forever. The love of my daughter is all I have left. My burden would have become hers… when the time was right… but now… it falls to you. Me? Return the crystal. [Coughs] Save Atlantis. Save my daughter. [Stops breathing] [Horn blows in distance] [Takes deep breath] Hmm. So, what’s it going to be? Excuse me? I followed you in, and I’ll follow you out. It’s your decision. Oh, my decision? Well, I think we’ve seen how effective… my decisions have been. Let’s recap. I lead a band of plundering vandals… to the greatest archeological find… in recorded history… thus enabling the kidnap and/or murder… of the royal family… not to mention personally delivering… the most powerful force known to man… into the hands of a mercenary nutcase… who’s probably going to sell it to the Kaiser! Have I left anything out? Well, you did set the camp on fire… and drop us down that big hole. Thank you. Thank you very much. Of course, it’s been my experience… when you hit bottom… the only place left to go is up. [Sighs] Who told you that? A fella by the name of Thaddeus Thatch. Where are you going? I’m going after Rourke. Milo, that’s crazy. I didn’t say it was the smart thing… but it is the right thing. [Sighs] Come on. We better make sure he doesn’t hurt himself. Milo, what do you think you are doing? Just follow my lead. [Engine revs] Wow. I’m impressed. It’s simple. All you got to do… Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shut up. We get it, OK? No, no, wait! [Thud] [Atlanteans gasp] Gently. Just gently. Hey, Milo, you got something sporty? You know, like a tuna? How is this done? All you got to do is use the crystals. Kida showed me. Half-turn right, quarter-run back. Keep your hand on the pad. Saddle up, partners. Bring jerky and ammo. [Engines revving] I’m so excited. MILO: All right, this is it! We’re going to rescue the princess. We’re going to save Atlantis. Or we’re going to die trying. Now let’s do it! [Atlanteans cheering] [Explosion] I love it when I win. OK, here’s the plan. We’re going to come in low and fast… and take them by surprise. Well, I’ve got news for you, Milo. Rourke is never surprised, and he’s got a lot of guns. Great. Well, do you have any suggestions? Yeah. Don’t get shot. There they are! We’ve got company! Take off! Take her up! [Gunfire] Holy smokes! You told me he only had guns. What I said was, he’s never surprised. OK, now things are getting good. Vinny! Heads up! We can’t let them reach the top of that shaft! Aah! Vinny, new plan. You and me, we’re going to be decoys. Audrey, Sweet, fly up underneath that thing… and cut her loose. SWEET: We’re on it. Lieutenant! I though you said this thing… could cut through a femur in 28 seconds! Less talk, more saw. Uhh! Looks like somebody’s working overtime. Come on, girl. Time’s up. AUDREY: Whoa! All right, Milo, this is it. Any last words? Yeah. I really wish I had a better idea than this! ROURKE: We’re losing altitude. Lighten the load. Unh! That’s it, unless someone wants to jump. Ladies first. Uhh! HELGA: You said we were in this together! Uhh! You promised me a percentage! Next time, get it in writing. Aah! Nothing personal. Unh! Yaah! Aah! - Uhh! - Unh! - Aah! - Uhh! Well, I have to hand it to you. You’re a bigger pain in the neck… than I would have ever thought possible. I consider myself an even-tempered man. It takes a lot to get under my skin… but congratulations… you just won the solid-gold kewpie doll. [Metal creaks] Uhh… Uhh! Uhh! Nothing personal. Tired, Mr. Thatch? Hyah! Aw, that’s a darn shame… because I’m just getting warmed up. Aah! [Rumbling] Aah! Aah! [Shrieks] Aah! Thank heaven. Whoa! [Growls] [Shrieks] [Groaning] Uhh! Ahh. Oh, great! Ahh. [Rumbling] MOLE: The volcano… she awakes! Hey, I had nothing to do with it. COOKIE: This here would be a good place not to be. No, wait. We got to get her back… or the whole city will die. And if we don’t get out of here, we’ll die. It’s the only way to reverse this. MILO: Just do it! AUDREY: Milo, no! Go! MILO: Aah! Whoa! Whoa! The fissure… it is about to eject… its pyroclastic fury! Milo, Mole says the wall’s going to blow! Unh! Uhh! [Atlanteans gasp] [Voices murmuring] [Crackling] [Electricity crackles] [Rumbling] [Voices murmuring] [Wind whistling] [Electricity crackles] [Thunder] [Rumbling] [Loud boom] [Muffled splashing] [Electricity crackles] [Cracking] [Rumbling] Uhh. Milo? Atlantis will honor your names forever. I only wish there was more we could do for you. Uh, you know, thanks anyway… but I think we’re good. They’ll take you as far as the surface. We are really going to miss you, Milo. You know, I’m going to reopen the flower shop… and I’m going to think of you guys every single day… Monday through Friday, Saturday until 2:00. Sunday… I’m going to take Sunday off probably, and… Maybe I’ll go in for a couple of hours, you know… but August… I’m going to take August. I ain’t so good at speechifyin’… but I wanted you to have this. It’s the bacon grease from the whole trip. Cookie, l… [Mutters] Aw… [Kiss] Ah-ah. See you, Milo. MOLE: Hey, Milo! Heh heh! [Insects buzzing] [Laughs] Mole. Mole. Wow. Hey, well… good-bye, Mole. Now, you sure you want to stay? There’s a hero’s welcome… waiting for the man who discovered Atlantis. Ah, I don’t think the world needs another hero. Besides, I hear there’s an opening down here… for an expert in gibberish. You take good care of yourself, Milo Thatch. Yeah. You, too, Sweet. Come here. [Crack] Unh! Sweet, uh, before you go, could you… No problem. [Crack] Ah. Oh. Thanks. Ha ha ha! Oh, you’re getting a bill. Can we go home now? Come on, y’all. Let’s get one last shot… in front of the fish. Say "Gochk." ALL: Gochk. [Camera shutter clicks] Now, let’s go over it again… just so we got it straight. You didn’t find anything? Nope. Just a lot of rocks… and fish… little fish. VINN Y: Sponges. What happened to Helga? Well, we lost her when a flaming zeppelin come down on her. Missing. WHITMORE: That’s right. And Rourke? Nervous breakdown. You could say he went all to pieces. In fact, you could say he was transamorgafied… and then busted into a zillion… Ahem. He’s missing, too. What about Milo? Went down with the sub. [Mole burrows] MOLE: Ah ha ha! Lord, give me strength. Ohh. I’m going to miss that boy. At least he’s in a better place now. MILO: Dear Mr. Whitmore… I hope this piece of proof is enough for you. [Rumbling] [Screeching] [Music playing] MYA, SINGING: They’ll try to hold you back And they will say you’re wrong But they will never understand The journey that you’re on Mm-hmm They’ll try to change your mind They’ll try to change your heart Oh, yeah But they will never understand Who you are And you’ll still believe Still believe And you know You must go Where the dream takes you Where your heart longs to be Oh When you finally find that place You’ll find all you need Where the dream takes you Where the dream takes you Oh, whoa There’s something in your soul Something in your soul That won’t be denied It’s the faith to dream that keeps The dream alive So you’ll still believe Still believe And you know You must go Where the dream takes you Where the dream takes you Where your heart longs to be When you finally find that place You’ll find all you need Where the dream takes you Go where your heart is meant to be And you may find Somebody there Someone to share your dream Oh, oh, oh Whoa, whoa Oh All right All right When you finally find that place You’ll find all you need Where the dream leads you Your dream will lead you on Only your heart can see Oh, yeah There’s a world that waits for you You’re not alone You’ll find your home Where the dream takes you Try to change your mind Where the dream takes you Try to change your heart Where the dream takes you But you must go Where the dream takes you [Chorus singing]